Lessons in News

No Name for Hair?

This morning while preparing for school, Jamie brushed her hair with a Dollar store brand hairbrush. “It’s the best!” She claims, “They’re really, really cheap but they last longer than my old brand, any day.”

Jamie’s mother stands by her daughter on the subject. “Jamie has really thick hair, and the Dollar store brush is the only one that hasn’t broken yet. I mean, we were going through brushes every two months if not sooner. The best thing is, they have hair brushes for everyone. We bought a soft bristled brush there that works just great for the cat!” She explained to me during our interview.

Jamie buys most of her products at the Dollar store, or other bargain places. She says that sometimes cheaper just is better – and she loves to buy in bulk.

Her neighbor, who is asking to remain unnamed, complains that Jamie’s family is too cheap. “They buy everything at bargain stores! It’s a wonder anyone can get anything of quality there. Dollar Stores, bulk stores – those people are so cheap!”

Jamie however, is loyal to her no name brand supplies. She says that her hairbrush now, is the favorite one she has ever had “And it only cost a dollar!”.


Teenager Finds Pretty Pen

Today while walking on her way to class, a student found a pen. She wishes to go unnamed, and says she will not give it back no matter who comes to claim it.

“It’s mine,” she claims. “I found it, so it’s mine. I love the color green, and this pen is green. I like to write, it’s made for writing. It was destiny!”

We decided to go and interview some other people at the school. The French teacher, Miss M says “That student is too attached to her pen! I saw her playing with it earlier today. She treats it better than she treated her baby for parenting class.”

Upon interviewing some of this student’s friends, we found that this isn’t the first time she has done such a thing. “She finds the craziest things, and then like falls in love with them. She gets attached to objects so easily!” Stephanie, a close friend states. “It’s really weird, but oh well. It takes all sorts!” She exclaims.

This unnamed student and her pen will hopefully be safe, as so far no one has stepped up to claim the green pen.